Biden Lost In Corn Maze, White House Blames Cobra Commander
The White House reported today that it has been 3 days since President Joe Biden was last seen entering into a corn maze. By all accounts, it is believed that the President is lost and can’t find his way out.
Biden was attending a rally in Springfield when he wandered off the stage and into the corn maze. Reportedly, there were only 5 other people attending the rally and none of them saw Biden enter the maze.
The White House immediately blamed Cobra Commander for the incident, citing his presence at the rally and non-stop laughter after it was reported that Biden was missing.
“How is this my fault,” the Commander said. “I just told him I saw someone running into the corn maze wearing swimming trunks with no bathing cap. He rushed into the maze screaming, ‘I’ll get you, Corn Pop!’ I have no idea what he was talking about.”
Municipal records indicate that the corn maze was located on land owned by Cobra Commander and the candidate that Biden was attending the rally for appears to have died 18 years ago.
Springfield officials have stated that all available police units have been called to the scene to search for Biden and have assured the White House that they should arrive sometime in December of 2024, after the next presidential election.
“I assure you that timing is purely coincidental,” Cobra Commander said when asked if this was a plot to keep Biden from running against him in 2024. “The Springfield police just happen to be preoccupied investigating reports of citizens melting in the streets.”
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